a pensieve


the Butterfly

I found this empty draft when I logged in. I can’t remember why I gave it a title of the Butterfly maybe I was to write about transformation?  Whatever was my reason then is beyond me.

Why am I now updating this blog? I am not sure, really. But let’s see in the coming days, if I am going back to blogging again.


wishlist (updated)

I created a wishlist last December 2010, and I decided to update it since, the year is almost half-way through.

1. Work. Then eventually, work abroad (eg. Singapore). – I didn’t really succeed in finding work in Singapore, but I happened to experience a “part-time” gig as a web tester.

2. Cruise.

3. Go to Bora on ber-months. – As of December last year, KZBP already managed to book us a ticket to Boracay for November. I really hope that pushes through.

4. Out-of-Town Trip with Mommy and the Family.

5. Learn and Get a License to Drive (mainstay of my list since, 2006)

6. Learn how to ride a bike (another one of my list mainstay since 2006).

7. Starbucks Planner for 2011 Thanks to KZBP, CGT, MV, and TM.

8. Bible. The easy to understand version. Thanks KZBP! mwah!

9. Another cheap phone I can use.

10. ClimbHad that Pulag Climb courtesy of KZBP and CGT last February.

11. A bookset of Harry Potter.

12. Another pair of flat shoes.

13. A couple of Office Attires. A couple of Slacks, and a couple of presentable blouses.Courtesy of Mommy before I left for Singapore last March.

14. DVD set of Charmed. Not necessarily original copy, as long as it’s complete.

15. DVD set of Gilmore Girls. Not necessarily original copy, as long as it’s complete.

16. Save up. (a permanent mainstay of my list since forever!)

17. Continue with my “cooking”.

18. Baking and Cooking utensils and equipments.

19. New Hiking Shoes.

20. TV. A big flat screen TV.

21. Read a book per month.
(January – Mga Kaibigan ni Mama Susan by Bob Ong
February – The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson) – I already lost track of the months I’ve read what book, but so far, I am keeping up with this.

22. Write more. Blog more.

23. Be better in English.

24. DVD of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.

25. a water/shock/dust proof na point and shoot camera.

26. My Own Laptop.

27. Revisit Singapore, Hongkong, Macau, Thailand, Malaysia, Vietnam. – revisited Singapore last March

28. Visit Batanes. And some more provinces in Visayas and Mindanao.

29. Surf!!! (with in-action astig-looking Pictures!)

30. Another external hard drive.

31. Learn to Say NO.

32. Visit a new place here in the Philippines.

33. Visit a new country.

34. Lose weight.

35. Forgive and Let Go.

36. Appreciate More. Complain Less.

37. Be Patient and Cool.

38. Sleep and Wake Up Early.

39. Take more pictures.

40. Go home early. Don’t create unnecessary galas.

41. Less Starbucks.

42. Movie nights should only be maximum of twice a month.

43. Schedule a date with Mommy at least twice a month.

44. NO BOYS or any activity related to that for a year (started since October 8, 2010).

45. iPAD or iTOUCH.

46. A box of crayons. The one with so many colors.

47. A box of color pencils. The one by Faber Castell with so many colors.

48. Printed and Framed Collage of Pictures of me and my friends.

49. Big, Sossy Looking Picture Frames.

50. A gift certificate or sponsor to print my “best shots” so, I can framed them.

51. Another ream of colored papers.

52. Write Poems again.

53. Draw Again.

54. Pray More.

55. Smile More.

56. Less Emo-attacks.

57. A new pair of Jeans.

58. Be more Friendly.

59. A Big Tumbler from Starbucks.

60. Learn how to ride a Skateboard.

61. Tita Be will be better.

62. A pair of Knee-High Boots. (This is my wishlist, shut up haha!)

63. Participate in a Medical Mission.

64. Participate in a Tree Planting activity.

65. Visit Indonesia.

2nd month; 2nd week

I’m on my second month of stay here in Singapore and my second week of stay here in Pasir Ris.

I still get depress every once in a while, but that feeling of being needed and “usefulness” made everything bearable. hahaha. I get to help SVC with her online shop, I go to SingPost to send out the orders (and use her laptop for my job hunting) while she’s in school during mornings.

No unnecessary dramas too. I am more comfortable here and one of the reasons is because I get to play with big little Geof. AC and SVC made one of the corners here in the flat as my “room”. It’s soooo cute, it just feels like my room at home.

And as usual during weekends, I get to spend it out and often times with ES. hahaha. He usually takes care of all our expenses then he would give me the receipt so I’d know how much I’ll reimburse him when I finally have work. hahaha.

so far I am generally ok, I am just hoping that I’d find work soonest possible time.


This is the longest time that I have been away from home.

Thank You God, for the gift of technology that we can connect to people we love easily these days, but nonetheless.

Today, I am supposed to be going back home. But last Monday, my request for a social visit pass extension was granted so, now, I am allowed to stay for another month.


I have realized a couple of things today:

a. I think if I had push through with that teaching stint in an English Camp for Korean, I could have bigger chance of getting a work.

b. I feel like I am on a working Holy Week.

c. I am four years too late for this adventure. haha. Or I should just have stayed longer last June.

d. That after thinking about items a-c I didn’t find myself dwelling with it. hmmm, nagmamature na? hahaha.

e. I hate people who are inconsistent, and lately, I am becoming one of the most inconsistent AND unstable person that I know. I therefore conclude, I am beginning to hate myself?!?!

f. I am tired of “drama”. really. I have too much of my own worries and problems to put up with other people’s drama. Hence, I am becoming anti-social hahaha.

g. I miss my mommy and sisters and niece. I really do. But I know that I want them coming here and us making pasyal than me going back home.

h. Haven’t had a single stick since last Sunday night.

i. One of my favorite time of the day is whenever I hear Lia’s Aunt sing to her to sleep.


this post is slightly “sabog”. hahahaha.

dropping by

it’s been a while since my last post here. nothing much, but at the same time too much, had happened to me.

i’ll post here soon.

for now, I would like to request for your prayers that I may be able to find work soonest possible time.

God bless, everyone! always remember that “God’s Will; God’s Bill!”

who I want to be my other half

I really don’t know why I suddenly I have this urge to write about this, but I guess I have my sister and my “older brother”‘s photos to blame. hahaha.

I know that I’ve always wanted that the man I’d spent the rest of my life will have these certain qualities. My NON-NEGOTIABLES.

1. First and foremost, I’ve always wanted someone who’d lead me back to the Lord. Someone who’d make me to want to be a better person not only for him and for myself but also in the eyes of our Lord.

2. He’s not only my husband, he should also be my best friend, my travel buddy, my critique and my playmate. He can not only be a MAN, but he can be a BOY, at the right time and at the right place.

3. I can talked to him about anything and everything under the sun. No dull moments, no awkward silences, no boring times. He’s got to have a sense of humor. JIVE KAME in other words.

4. He would let me have my way ’cause he hates it when I can’t. But knows when he has to put his foot down on certain occasions.

5. He should love to take pictures (of me specially) and would travel with me anywhere. If he is a swimmer and can ride a bike, would be a plus.

6. and most importantly, HE would never ever cheat on me, because I am NOT his NUMBER ONE but simply because, I AM HIS ONLY ONE.

hhhmmmmm… ♥♥♥

The Other Side

After almost 5 years, I found myself willing to be reunited again with Mt. Pulag. But of course, with the help (morally, financially and “clothing”-ly) of CGT and KZBP.

Prior to the actual climb, there were already been warnings (even read in a newspaper) that it will be very cold and there is a slim chance of witnessing the sunrise that Mt. Pulag is known for. So, honestly, my expectation (to see again the sunrise) is at the minimum bordering to none.

What came as a surprise is the sunset that we were able to witness. It was like a forest fire from afar. The fog didn’t even diminish the richness of its color.

Sunset of Mt. Pulag

Another thing is the night sky of Mt. Pulag. It was, as I’ve seen before, still beyond words. The stars are indeed like scattered diamonds in the sky. And, by the way, I had a small surprise from God. He sent me a wishing star. 🙂

Oh, did I mention that it was really cold? The temperature there dropped as low as -2 degrees. It was crazy cold. The cold made me crazy. hahaha.

As we trekked going to summit (while fooling ourselves that somehow the sunrise would make a surprise appearance) it was raining (or was it drizzling?) And when we reached the summit, we just stayed in a corner (if you can call it a corner) hiding amongst the tall grass. We (at least our small group) slept the cold away.

But despite of it all, I can say that, this trip had been fun, memorable and enjoyable. What they say is true, the destination is just a bonus. It’s the company we keep and the journey that what counts the most.

To These Friends, I am Most Thankful For.

Dear Lord, For You have loved me so dearly that I feel so blessed. For these gifts of friendship and wonders of nature, I am forever grateful for. I love You. Amen.